Kindness and Cruelty
As my children grow up, parenting is becoming increasingly more difficult. There is much talk about the early years. How much work it is to have a baby. The sleepless nights. The diapers. The endless debate between breastfeeding and formula. In retrospect, babies were relatively easy. Relatively. Of course it’s work, and it is exhausting (especially to all the mothers out there who bear the brunt of this work most of the time). Babies are neither kind nor cruel. A certain level of sentience is a prerequisite to choosing kindness or cruelty. A spider isn’t cruel to the fly, it’s simply a predator and prey relationship. A tiny human laughs and cries. She may gently squeeze your finger or bite the child next to her in daycare. These are neither kind nor cruel behaviors, simply the primitive responses of a mind which has not learned either.
The Early Years
I now must contrast those toddler years with the difficult decisions that arise as children age. It starts out slow. You want to make sure they learn their ABCs. How to count. Colors. Shapes. Then comes the reading journey, fighting through years of Dr. Seuss books, Goodnight Moon, and the Hungry Caterpillar. And things grow more difficult. How long do we keep up with the Christmas ruse? The Tooth Fairy? The Easter Bunny? For how long do we lie to our children in hope that they will learn some lesson about selflessness by…
